Experts reveal the common signs of porn addiction and how to get help

Broadcaster Ore Oduba, known for his 2016 Strictly Come Dancing win, has publicly revealed his nearly three-decade-long battle with porn addiction for the first time.

Speaking on Paul C Brunson’s We Need To Talk podcast, the 39-year-old TV and radio presenter detailed how his introduction to pornography at age nine led to a habit that “destroyed” his life over three decades.

Oduba revealed he overcame the addiction “a year-and-a-half ago”, explaining: “It had been destroying my life from the inside out, but it was the thing from a very early age that I was running to as a response to a lot of the trauma.”

He further elaborated on the profound stigma associated with such addictions, stating: “I became a master masker. I had to keep it quiet.

“This is the problem with this form of addiction that even I could understand at 10…it’s so shameful.”

The father-of-two expressed his desire to break his silence, hoping to guide his own children and support others grappling with similar struggles.

Porn addiction still largely remains a taboo and widely misunderstood, so we spoke to some experts to find out what the most common signs are and when it’s time to seek help.

What is a porn addiction?

“In today’s digital age, access to pornography has never been easier,” says Alex Warden, an addiction therapist who supports patients at Priory Hospital Chelmsford. 

“For some people, it remains a casual activity, but for others, it can develop into a compulsive behaviour that affects their mental health, relationships and overall wellbeing.

“Porn addiction refers to a compulsive or uncontrollable urge to view pornography, even when it leads to negative consequences.”

Paula Hall, accredited BACP sex and relationship psychotherapist and founder of Pivotal Recovery, agrees and adds that it’s often referred to as a spectrum disorder.

“At one end it’s recreational causing no problems at all, then there’s more problematic usage in the middle, and then you have addictive or compulsive usage right on the other end of the spectrum,” explains Hall.

What are some common signs of a porn addiction to look out for?

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It’s not necessarily about how often someone watches porn, but rather about how it impacts their life, explains Warden.

“When viewing becomes a coping mechanism for stress, loneliness, or low mood – and begins to interfere with relationships, work, or self-esteem – it may indicate an addiction pattern,” he says.

Here are six common signs to look out for:

1) Loss of control

“A common indicator of a developing porn addiction includes feeling unable to reduce or stop consumption, despite wanting to,” highlights Warden.

2) Tolerance

“Needing more frequent or extreme content to achieve the same effect could also be a key indicator of an addiction,” says Warden.

Hall agrees and adds: “For some people, they notice an escalation in terms of content and start viewing images and material that is more and more novel.”

3) Neglecting responsibilities

“Missing work, study, or social obligations due to pornography use is another red flag,” says Warden.

4) Emotional distress

“Experiencing guilt, shame, anxiety, or low self-worth after viewing could also be a sign of an addiction,” notes Warden.

5) Relationship strain

“A porn addiction can lead to someone becoming secretive, detached or less interested in real intimacy,” says Warden.

6) Using porn to cope 

“Turning to pornography to manage sadness, stress, or boredom is another common sign,” adds Warden.

Why is this behaviour concerning? 

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Porn addiction can have both mental and physical consequences.

“Mentally, it often fuels guilt, anxiety, and loneliness,” explains Warden. “It can distort perceptions of intimacy and lead to unrealistic expectations about sex and relationships.

“Physically, some people experience sexual dysfunction, reduced arousal in real encounters, or desensitisation to normal sexual stimuli.

“Over time, the brain’s reward pathways adapt to this high level of stimulation, making everyday experiences feel less rewarding.”

Why are so many people afraid to seek help about this kind of addiction?

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“Many people hesitate to seek help because they feel deep shame or fear being judged,” says Warden.

“Sexual topics are often taboo, and individuals may worry that admitting a struggle will label them as “perverse” or “broken”.

“In reality, compulsive porn use is a behavioural issue rooted in emotional regulation, not a moral failing. Breaking the silence and viewing it through a mental health lens is the first step toward healing.”

When should someone seek professional help about this?

“If pornography use feels out of control, interferes with daily life, or creates emotional or relational distress, professional help should be considered,” advises Warden.

“Ignoring the issue can worsen isolation, anxiety, and relationship difficulties. Seeking therapy early can restore balance and self-control before patterns become deeply entrenched.”

Hall agrees and adds, “Don’t wait until you get really addicted, as soon as you start worrying about your porn use, that is the time to reach out for help. On the Pivotal Recovery site, we have an ‘Are you an addict?‘ assessment tool which can help.”

Are there any therapies/treatments that can help?

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“Several therapeutic approaches can support recovery, including Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) which can help identify the thoughts and triggers that maintain compulsive use, and trauma-informed therapy which explores deeper emotional or relational wounds that may underlie the behaviour,” says Warden.

Looking for relevant expertise and qualifications is key when finding a therapist.

“I would always recommend that people ensure they’re using someone who is a specialist and trained in this field,” advises Hall.

Group therapy and support groups can also useful.

“They can help provide accountability and reduce shame through shared experiences,” says Warden.

Furthermore, sometimes mindfulness-based interventions and medication are advised.

“Mindfulness-based interventions can help teach self-awareness and emotional regulation and in some cases medication can assist if underlying anxiety, depression, or impulse control issues are present,” says Warden.

How can partners and family members help support a loved one going through this?

“Partners and family members can play an essential role in recovery by encouraging open, honest dialogue without blame and by educating themselves about addiction and recovery,” says Warden.

“Support works best when it combines empathy with accountability, helping the person feel both understood and responsible for their growth.”